Back in the day, when someone was saying something around a child that would be better for a child not to hear, another adult might say “little ears.” This was a reminder to be cautious about what you say around a child. As we get older, people stop worrying about our ears. We don’t usually worry about them, either. But maybe we should actually try to have “little ears.” After all, as Alan Jackson sings, “it’s alright to be little bitty.”
One of the saddest things about our political moment is how cynical and despairing so many people seem to be. The historian Doris Kearns Goodwin recently spoke at my campus and not only did she charm the students, she offered some optimism. As much as historical comparisons for our moment aren’t all great–the 1850s feels a little too familiar–cynicism won’t get us anywhere. She encouraged people to remember that “words hurt” when speaking of others. She explained how flawed men were still able to be very good presidents. She refused to suggest there is a master key for leadership, but she emphasized the importance of humility, empathy, resilience, accessibility, being able to communicate, and ambition for something larger. She left listeners less discouraged and she inspired students to try to make a positive difference in the world. We don’t hear messages like this enough.
One of the reasons it’s so easy to be cynical is because of what we consume. We watch and listen to angry people, we feel angry. We click the clickbait. We hang out with people who have no hope for the future and we go home feeling hopeless. We might be better off protecting our little ears.
You may not care for Plato’s Republic or Thomas More’s Utopia, but both recognize the importance of what people are exposed to and consume. Plato was against most poetry and stories. He didn’t think the scandalous stories of the gods would encourage the right kind of religion. He didn’t think all the fantastical elements of fiction would help secure a love of the truth. In Utopia, we learn that the Utopians limit who can shed even animal blood. Not everyone should be slaughtering their own animals. They might develop a taste for shedding blood. In our own time, we can individually be less cavalier without going in for full-scale social engineering.
This definitely relates to the news, but not only the news. (Jeffrey Bilbro’s book Reading the Times offers helpful advice for how not to overexpose ourselves to the news.) If you come from a conservative background (or know someone who does), you can also take some tips from old school parents. A lot of people weren’t able to watch everything on tv as children, for a wide variety of reasons. I know someone who couldn’t watch Rugrats because the children were considered disrespectful to the parents on that show. A lot of people couldn’t watch Smurfs, because it might be communist. On Twitter the other day I learned that some people have banned Spongebob from their homes because it is “over-stimulating.” Spongebob really might be killing attention spans, by the way. It is apparently one of the worst offenders. Now, maybe you can handle Smurfs, but there might be other shows you should stay away from as an adult.
In order to protect our ears, we have to admit two things. First, we have to admit that even as adults, we are easily influenced. We are not immune to television and movies and videogames and the news. We are certainly not immune to our social circles. Quite the opposite. Second, we have to admit that we should be protected. We have to take ourselves seriously enough to take some precautions. We have to believe we are worth defending. If the first misstep is to believe too much in ourselves to consider carefully what we consume, the second misstep is to believe too little in ourselves to consider that we are worth protecting.
You know what your needs are. If you don’t, ask around. If you have become so obsessed with true crime that you have created a “murder book” to help guide authorities, in case you get murdered…you probably need to ease up on the podcasts. If you believe that “everyone” in a certain profession is a horrible person and you’re almost never talking about arms dealers… slow down. If you think everyone who isn’t a doomsday prepper is dumb… you might have a despairing outlook on the world that is hurting you in many areas of life. It is so easy for us to develop a distorted view of the world.
What should you do to protect yourself and try to maintain a balanced and accurate perception of the world? It depends on your circumstance. Maybe you want to start doing “earmuffs” for yourself in certain conversations until your friends ask you what is going on. Maybe you want to watch the old Louis C.K. clip once in a while about how “everything is amazing, and nobody is happy.” Maybe you want to touch grass. Maybe you have a more mature and thoughtful approach in mind than any of those. Hopefully so. You can start anywhere as long as you know that it’s ok, and even good, to have little ears.